Counselling

Counselling & Therapy

I offer two types of services for couples. Marriage Counselling and Discernment Counselling.  For both services both partners need to attend together.  For partners whose mate does not want to attend counselling I offer Hopeful Spouse Counselling.  There is no need for your mate to come for therapy if they don’t want to. 

 

COUPLE/MARRIAGE COUNSELLING

For couple/marriage counselling, the modality I use for marriage counselling is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT).  EFT is an empirically based and cutting-edge approach to marriage counselling.  Research shows 70-75% of couples journey from marital distress to repair and recovery. 90% show significant improvement in their relationship.  Recovery is stable and lasting with little evidence of relapse or distress.  It is a short-term structured approach to couple’s therapy and typically takes 8-20 session but can be longer depending on how distressed the couple is.



Results and Outcomes for Couple/Marriage Counselling

  • You’ll both start to calming down the shouting, turn up the volume of the silent treatment and get unstuck.
  • You’ll find clarity in what you’re doing unconsciously that is causing issues that make your arguments spiral out of control, angry, upset or frustrated and correct that.
  • You’ll change unconscious patterns and behaviours to experience a new way of being and love.
  • You’ll both practise these new behaviours and communication with me before you do it yourself.

DISCERNMENT COUNSELLING

Discernment counselling is a transformational experience for couples where one spouse is not sure whether they want to stay in the marriage or not.  They may doubt whether marriage counselling will work for them or they don’t want to attend marriage counselling.  The modality accepts mixed agenda couples and works with their ambivalence rather than sweeping it under the carpet.

The initial commitment for couples is simply a one, 2-hour session.  During the session each person decides separately if they would like one more session for a maximum of five session.  The goal for discernment counselling is to provide clarity and confidence for the direction of the marriage that is based on a deeper understanding of what has happened and how each person has contributed to the problem.



Results and Outcomes for Discernment Counselling

  • You’ll deepen your clarity and confidence about a decision for the future of your marriage or relationship.
  • You’ll deepen your understanding of what’s happened that brought you both to this point, and understand the role each of you played to encourage it.
  • You’ll mutually agreed-upon plan of action, if you decide to repair the marriage in couples therapy.
  • You’ll have insights about each other and the relationship that you’ll carry forward into future relationships, should you both decide to end the relationship.
  • You’ll come to a mutual conclusion and agreement and select one of three paths. First to remain status quo, second decide to divorce amicably or work on the marriage for six months with the resources needed with divorce off the table.


HOPEFUL SPOUSE COUNSELLING

If you find that your partner refuses to attend couples therapy or marriage cousnelling, then Hopeful Spouse Counselling may be appropriate for you. Consider it like help or coaching for yourself to learn what you can do without your partner being involve.  You are taking a proactive approach to your relationship.

There could be many reasons why a person would like to work on the relationship while the other may not.  It could be they are not ready or simply refuses to.  If this describes your relationship or marriage, we can help. 

 

 

Results and Outcomes for Hopeful Spouse Counselling

  • You’ll put the focus back on yourself and what is possible for you and your choices.
  • You’ll find clarity and guidance to look into what would make a difference in your relationship.
  • You’ll understand the power you have in the relationship and become an agent for change.


Having Difficulties With Your Marriage?

If you are having difficulty in your marriage and you would like to see if my approach is right for you, you are welcome to book in a 45 minute free, no obligations, fully confidential call with me

During this call we will discover

  •  If your marriage would benefit from my approach.
  • Get clarity on what you need to do to make the marriage work.
  • What you might be doing unconsciously that is preventing you from being happy and in love.
  • What you need to do to get back to that happy place where you are both in love again.

What we talk about in sessions

  • Calm down the shouting, turn up the volume of the silent treatment and get unstuck.
  • Find clarity in what you are doing unconsciously that is causing issues that make your arguments spiral out of control, angry, upset or frustrated and correct that.
  • Change unconscious patterns and behaviours to experience a new way of being.
  • Practise new behaviour and communication with me before you do it yourself.
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